From the inbox (emphasis added):

My name is [redacted] and I am the SEO expert of a leading SEO service provider company. As per my analysis, your website is not performing well in the Google organic search. Also your traffic is poor from last couple of months due to some of the reasons.

Some of the aspects given below:

  1. Due to poor Back links
  2. Keywords are not in the first page of Google, Yahoo and Bing
  3. Due to errors and issues present in website
  4. Errors in the coding part of your website
  5. Website content quality is not high standard.

Area of Improvement:

  1. We will give you 1st page ranking on Google, Yahoo, and Bing.
  2. Improve your sales and brand value.
  3. 100% satisfaction guarantee or your full money back.
  4. Hummingbird recovers and secures your website from next Google updates.
  5. Increase your traffic flow.
  6. Target your local market to increase business.

Some comments on our areas of improvment:

  1. When I google "environmental economics" it still comes up first. Is that still happening for others?
  2. How could our sales be even better? And after the oil spill, our brand was so destroyed that not even a million dollar tourism campaign could improve it. 
  3. Right on.
  4. Huh?
  5. Indeed
  6. We have no local market (unless you count Pete Groothuis)

And would someone please help us with errors and content quality?

Posted in ,
  1. Ironman Avatar

    The site came up #2 behind the Wikipedia entry for “Environmental Economics”.
    Admittedly, “See the slick while it lasts!” wasn’t the best slogan for the campaign.
    That should read “Hummingbirds recover and secure your website…”. As a species, they’re remarkably good at data recovery.
    Definitely a cherished demographic!

  2. Drew Moxon Avatar

    For #1, Google with alter ranking slightly depending on searcher “intent” (not entirely sure how good their intent algo’s are…). Per #5 – sorry about that, content quality probably went down after I started posting. And for the general message – PESKY SEO TROLLS!

  3. Tim Haab Avatar

    At our age, any increase in flow is a good thing.

  4. Peter Groothuis Avatar

    Speaking for your local market. We need more bumper stickers and T-shirts. Also more Friday Beer posts.

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